Alyx: Wow - two years of teaching have flown by. The first spin class I ever went to keeps coming to mind. It was in a dark, nearly empty room. A rider left in the middle of the class to throw up and I couldn’t keep on beat in the fast songs to save my life. I kept going, but it was just a way to get myself to move, and I didn’t find myself connecting to the music or the people. The pandemic hit and I quit, and since I didn’t feel a sense of place or community at the studio I attended, I didn’t really miss it.
Fast forward to November of 2021, my friend Taylor posted about CHVRCH Cycle and that she was going to be training to become an instructor there. Her passion and love for cycling inspired me to get back into it. I never expected what I would find at CHVRCH: a naturally-lit room, instructors and music I felt connection with, and a beautiful, warm, and loving community. It felt different, and I fell in love with it immediately.
CHVRCH found me at a time I really needed it. I was struggling with extremely low self-worth, drinking every day, and nearly at rock bottom (my Saturn return was popping off). As a rider, I joined every challenge I could and threw myself into riding as much as possible. Every time a piece of choreography clicked, every time an instructor called out my name in class, every little bit of kindness the community showed me began to push me out of the hole I was in. Over time, CHVRCH became not just a place to move and escape, but to confront and move through heavy emotions.
Taylor started teaching and I started daydreaming about being up on the podium. She showed me that there was space for someone like me up there. Back then I had an idea of what a cycling instructor and what a “spin girlie” was and the instructors and riders at CHVRCH broke that stereotype for me. I began to wonder if teaching was something I’d ever think about trying.
Less than a year later, autumn of 2022, I decided on a whim to audition to be an instructor, and on October 1st I showed up and did my best - I also started my first sober October that day. Both those things sparked a big, transformative shift in my life.
Instructor training started and those seven weeks were huge - the support from my training group and from Naomi cracked my heart open and allowed me to be sensitive and vulnerable. Authenticity was not something to shy away from anymore. Her and Natasha made it clear that they didn’t want us to be carbon copies of other instructors. It felt like and continues to feel like the first space I could truly be myself.
Everything I’ve wanted out of teaching, I’ve gotten: the pleasure of having a creative musical release, the ability to share in a space of vulnerability with others, the chance to make friends with like-minded people, a microphone for sharing the deepest and silliest parts of myself, and the smiles of folks I love who are laughing and crying right along with me. We’ve seen and supported each other on some of our best and worst days and it’s really special to share in that love.
Teaching for the past couple years has been so rewarding. I talk about this in class a lot, but it’s incredible to watch CHVRCH transform lives like it transformed mine. Through both riding and teaching, I’ve grown my self-worth back, I’ve changed habits, and I’ve gained an immense amount of confidence I never thought I would have. I’ve also watched our riders take the confidence they’ve gained out of the studio to do real good in the world. I’m so grateful to have a part in that.
I continue to confront and move through it all with you. I see you, I love you, CHVRCH!